43. Running


Live, Laugh, Love


Running with your eyes closed is never safe.
It’s funny though, when I run with my eyes closed I can very
nearly pretend that I am somewhere else entirely. 
Where ever I desire at that moment.  It could be anywhere,
from sunshine to snowfall I’ll be there in a quick second
when I close my eyes while running. 
These days I don’t run as much,
let alone with my eyes closed. 

I think I may have to start. 

These days have been better than other days so
really I have no reason to not be doing so.

These days I have been brighter, sunnier.
Reese Witherspoon once said in a movie that,

“Exercise creates endorphins and endorphins make you happy and happy people don’t kill their husbands”
-Reese Witherspoon- Legally Blonde







I have been feeling a lot more like myself.  Actually strike that I have been feeling like a new me.  I’m still lost and confused but I was always that way so in reality that probably won’t change.  But Positivity has been my major priority.  It’s helped, I have decided that it’s going work out.  I need to stop worrying so much and just know that everything is going to be okay.

(If you quote that stupid don’t worry be happy song ill punch you in the face through the computer screen.  That’s right. THROUGH THE SCREEN)

I have come a long way.  North Dakota is an extreme place.  It’s hard on the mind, body and soul.  It really makes you slow down and recognize the importance of patience and appreciation.  It is completely different then my sunny beach town in Santa Cruz.  Especially Williston, ND.  Sometimes when we go on long drives to hit rigs and I look out into the horizon and all I see is a harsh reality.  When it’s hot you see rigs, dirty and greasy, loud and stinky.  But, when its snowing there is something immaculate and beautiful about them.  Their loudness fills the quiet of everything that has gone south for the winter.  All the smart mammals that went to warmer climates like Santa Cruz.  It’s about to be the Third winter I spend in Williston.  I have been all peachy rainbows and sunshine and shit but on the real life, YO I don’t think I can do another winter here.

Life is tough enough and then with the whole freedom and rights thing being stripped from me.  I know for a fact that my sunny demeanor is only going to last as long as the sunshine. 

I made split decisions in my life and then looked back and wondered why I did it.
But you know those split decisions are the decisions that will define me in the end.
The decisions that will give me the tools in the next adventure.
The good and the bad decisions.
The equality of the two is the real trick of life.
The balance of both worlds.
The give and the take.

Understanding that has begun to blow my mind.  Not only that but beginning to understand that life isn’t about vanity and materialism.  Something that was instilled in me yet forgotten.  A vain world can drag you into the depths.  It can make you forget where you came from and who created you.  Not me vain world.  My will is too strong to forget my roots.  I’m firmly planted. I’m waiting for my steal train

3 thoughts on “43. Running

  1. u kno ur problems is u should grow up. It is like reading a children’s book immature and full of fluff!!!! Getting too old for this story telling and running like a child. U kno be responsible. U r all make believe.

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