31… 32… Control Yourself

31 number-32

I missed Day 31…

Cera, Cera,

Today is day 32. 
It’s funny how I have turned this into my way to cope… my way to hide yet not hide at all from my problems…
How can someone feel so much better with their problems on display and not hidden from sight.?? Not blogging yesterday really hurt my feelings today… I woke up consumed with emotions I didn’t get a chance to release.


I’ve been recklessly angry lately.
My anger is uncontrollable and honestly completely confusing.



noun: self-control
  1. the ability to control oneself, in particular one’s emotions and desires or the expression of them in one’s behavior, especially in difficult situations.
    “Lucy silently struggled for self-control”
    synonyms: self-discipline, restraint, self-possession, self-command, willpower, composure, coolness; More

I lack this.

I forget other people exist sometimes when I’m consumed with panic.
The only thing that exists when I’m in that state is my own insanity.
The only power I have is the control I have over myself.
Yet how easily I can fly off the handle without some sort of “coping mechanism”
Anger Management maybe..

I’m Still Drug Free if it matters.


noun: self; plural noun: selves
  1. 1.
    a person’s essential being that distinguishes them from others, especially considered as the object of introspection or reflexive action.
    “our alienation from our true selves”
    synonyms: ego, I, oneself, persona, person, identity, character, personality, psyche, soul, spirit, mind,(inner) being

    “listen to your inner self”

upon reflection of the definitions I could see how maybe I am selfish.
Self Consumed.
The word “self” comes out of a lot of my sentences.
When I like me I Love me..
When I Don’t I Hate me..



Is all that I need.

3 thoughts on “31… 32… Control Yourself

  1. Definitely believe that which you stated. Your favorite justification appeared to be at the web the easiest factor to take
    note of. I say to you, I definitely get irked at the same time
    as people consider concerns that they plainly do not recognise about.
    You managed to hit the nail upon the top and also defined out the entire thing with no need side-effects , other people could take a signal.
    Will probably be again to get more. Thank you

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